Meaningless Noise or: The Day I’ve decided to Stop Worrying and Maybe Just Write on My Blog More…..again

Today (or rather two days ago) marks the day that I’ve started to regret my presence online. Specifically with blogs. The first blog I ever made was on OpenDiary back in 2007 or so. The site was shut down in 2014 (then relaunched early this year, apparently?) so the actual “diary” is not there anymore. (Sidenote: back when OpenDiary was a thing it was known as a community of diary writers, which makes absolutely no sense to me. Diaries are meant to be private last I checked so why would anyone share their diaries? Whatever.)

The second blog that I ever made was on Blogger. It lasted for a while and I posted video game reviews. All of the posts were essentially Zero Punctuation knock-offs. I eventually deleted all of the posts and all that’s there now is just two posts. I might just delete it altogether now that I’m writing about it.

The third “blog” I have is a Tumblr. I say have and is but it’s literally just become….well nothing really. Meaningless noise that goes nowhere, speaks to no one, and doesn’t really do much beyond putting something into the extremely dense waters of the massive data stream of the internet.

This one, the one on WordPress, is probably the only one aside from Blogger that I had attempted to actually keep updated and going for an amount of time. Everytime I come back I always feel like I have to come up with an excuse for not writing on it for so long. Each time I come up with this dumb excuse-ridden post I’m always ashamed for writing it. Are all my posts going to be excuses of why I haven’t been writing posts for a while?May as well change the title of this blog to “What’s Your Excuse?” and make up lists of excuses of why I haven’t written.

Maybe I should do that for fun. Something for another day.

Anyways. In thinking about this blog I’ve been deciding on whether I should delete all my posts and start over. Maybe I should hide all my old posts instead? That way if I want to I can just unprivate them if I decide to show anyone? It’s possible to do it.

Eh, I’ll think about it.

For now though I’m gonna just write more posts throughout the summer. I hope to have clearer plan at some point in the future.

I’m gonna stop here, I’m getting hungry.

Jeff Rodgers (5-20-2018)

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I remember 2017 like it was fourteen days ago

Do you remember the good old days? I do. I remember when everything was fine and nothing terrible happened and there were a lot of lovely smelling flowers and everyone was happy. Though that may be the lack of sleep talking. First week back at college has been a little rough, but I’m keeping in high spirits. I’m going to keep this post how I like my power naps: short and sweet.

I’m working on the anthology, slowly but surely (story of my life).

I’ve made a new year’s resolution to use social media more (again, story of my life). I’ve made a few tweets earlier in the year and will continue to do so throughout. I will leave my twitter handle at the end of this and subsequent posts.

That’s pretty much it. See you around!

Listening to a shithole spewing hatred,
Jeff Rodgers (1-13-2018)

Roy Moore lost and Net Neutrality will make a come back

2017 has been annoyingly slow for me it seems. I incidentally took a three month hiatus from making any posts except for the occasional political retweet and reblog. Hell I don’t think I’ve ever made an original tweet this year. Part of the reason for this was because of school which is finally over for now. I was at one point going to make a series of tweets outlining my anxieties revolving around social media and the current political climate, but that was thrown out the window. When I wrote it it was written in frustration and anger. A lot of that anger being related to the feeling of not having gotten anything done over the past year. I’d rather not subject you, dear reader, nor myself to something which I’ll regret posting later on. Instead of feeling shitty and thinking about what I didn’t get done I decided to force myself to take a look at what I have done over the past few years, maybe get some perspective.

I’ve always had a problem with anxiety and depression from when I was younger. It’s sometimes impossible for me to get rid of the extremely dark, monotonous, grey clouds that cover my vision. It’s a terrible condition. It wasn’t until recently that I realized that I had gotten more done this year than I thought I did. I’ve made eleven posts into my journal and five pieces of art, plus I worked on my writing skills while in school. In looking back I’ve decided to make an small anthology of the artwork and stories that I’ve made. The purpose of this is to try and keep myself positive and focused on what I want to do. Another way I’m trying to keep positive is reminding me of the good things that happened recently (thus the title of this post).

Over the next few weeks I’m going to be writing some stuff, making plans, and readying my body for 2018.

Here’s hoping everything goes well, both mentally and in general!

Jeff Rodgers (12-21-2017)

The Struggle: A comment I made on Youtube

(The video I’m responding t0)

(The comment itself)

I am a writer in college and for a while I considered being a journalist. One of the main reasons why I never went through with it was that when I actually had to write a story for a journalism class I would end up not doing enough research and would make something up just to get it done in time. Going through that and seeing this situation with PewDiePie just makes me kind of angry that people are being this unprofessional.

What happened to just finding and stating the facts? What happened to journalistic standards? When did journalism become a capitalist industry?? I feel that America after 2001 got scared and ever since we’ve just gotten paranoid and because of the paranoia everyone is just suddenly out for themselves. Blaming people for this thing and that thing to justify whatever story so they can get ahead or worse make a quick buck from the ensuing madness.

I’ve been trying to keep a positive outlook on everything over the past two months but it’s getting harder and harder to do so with each passing day. From the executive orders to this stupid situation I find that it’s all just wearing me down. I wish I could go to space. Space doesn’t have any of the problems that we have here on Earth. You think that the people who are going to Mars will leave, come back, and find the earth just completely desecrated? Broken into pieces with a giant hole on the side of it? I think that’s what’s going to happen, and when it does I will haunt the spaceship they are in and say “I told you so” before disappearing and being reincarnated as a four-legged creature on the distant planet of Zeidon.

Jeff Rodgers (2-16-2017)

My Dog Died a Few Days Ago, His Name was Apollo

So we’re currently, like, a week into the new year and I don’t know how I feel about it. Last year was shit if we’re honest but this year is not turning out to be that great either (or the beginning of the year at least). Near the end of last year I found out that I have Type 2 diabetes which is manageable but still problematic. This past week I’ve yet to start working on my diet and get my blood sugars down, so there’s that.

My dog died a few days ago, his name was Apollo. Apollo was a black Labrador who lived to be about 14 years old (around 80 in dog years). He had always been a loyal and well-mannered dog since he was young, even when he changed hands to be with my father rather than my mother. He was always happy, even as his health slowly deteriorated.

I miss him.

At least he won’t be here to see Donald Trump become president of the United States. I have a lot more to say about that but I’m going to hold off for now…at least until the inauguration.

Jeff Rodgers (1-7-2016)

I took a long shower and still feel dirty

Hey! It’s Jeff, the guy that wrote this. Even if you don’t make it as far as this paragraph please share with someone that needs something to cheer them up and tell them that everything will be okay. The Huffington Post posted an article that outlines resources for those who are overwhelmed, scared, or otherwise confused by the election that can be used to help support and maintain our established communities in this weird time we find ourselves in. Click on the word ‘LOVE‘ to see the article, otherwise read on and hear my stance on the matter.

I woke up this morning forgetting that Trump had won. At around one in the morning my dad had texted me saying that Clinton had lost. In the moments (or hours I guess) after receiving that text I couldn’t sleep. When I woke up I felt everything was normal until I looked up the results. I wish I didn’t see who won but I had to. My response to my dad’s text, which will probably be the title of my mixed emotional cry into the technological abyss, went as follows: “I took a long shower and I still feel dirty”

I’m currently enrolled at Southern Illinois University in Edwardsville (SIUe) where there are a variety of students and faculty from different backgrounds, different beliefs. I looked around at the people walking around on this cold November morning and saw faces that showed different variations of scared and tired. In my English class there was a girl who sat parallel with me. We looked and silently acknowledged one another; my hands shaking while I held a pencil, her eyes shrouded in red, both of us scared as hell of what’s to come.

There are many people in this country and abroad that will be going through the various stages of grief and loss. From denial and bargaining to yelling and sobbing. If there’s one thing I know it’s this: People experience joy to varying degrees but everyone suffers. People will have ways of coping with it. In an event that one is in danger the first thing that the body does is release any waste that the body has at the time. During an elevator ride up to my English class I shit myself just as I reached my floor. It wasn’t that big of a mess and it didn’t seep through my jeans. All I did was take off my underwear and went commando. Main point: It’s not the end of the world. I know it’s hard to believe, but it’s true.

Be angry, throw shade, yell, kick, scream, blame whoever you want, but find some way to keep your head held high and avoid violence (against yourself or other people), then tell others to do the same because, despite what it might seem, this will not last forever. This will all end. It may be a long time before it ends but it will end. We just need to support one another and help get through this as painlessly as possible. When the pain is over, I assure you, we will be much better off than where we are right now.

Once it’s all over I’ll quote a long-out-of-print science fiction writer and say: “You were sick and now you’re well and there’s work to do!”

Jeff Rodgers (11-9-2016)

If you’ve made it this far I urge you further to share this with anyone you feel needs another perspective, or just a little pick me up. It’s not much, but it’s my way of coping with this. I hope you all are safe and are feeling okay in this timultuous time.

An Update on Stuff

Hey so remember when I was gonna talk about what I wanted to accomplish? That’s happening now! As promised I would tell you about my plan for the fall as well as what I have been working on inbetween retweets and liking videos on Youtube (I gotta turn the sharing feature off on that thing).

Selling Out (well not really)

Since Puk Comics main website is down, I’ve thinking about putting my work on a separate place so that my work can be accessed regardless of whether the main site is up or not. I was thinking of using Gumroad as that place since it’s worked well for a couple of other artists that I follow. Plus it allows me to have control over anything that I put up. It’ll be interesting to see what happens.

Gettin Shorty

As I’ve probably mentioned before I’ve been wanting to write a few more short stories of different varieties. Gotta stretch my creative muscles you know what I mean? While I have been busy with college and have had little time to write much (Fun fact: it’s taken me almost a month to write this post). I have a couple of ideas, I’ll talk about it when I have something of note.

Other stuff that are floating in my head

Looking back I could’ve done more with A Love Story in East Germany. I made very few changes to the story and, while it is still good to me, I feel that it could be better. I remember a collegue stating that authors inform the reader of their vision as they develop their story, I feel like I’ve failed to do that. So there might a time where I re-release ALSiEG.

Dude I watched the new show Atlanta on FX and it’s fucking good! It’s propbably the first TV show I’ve seen that actually shows real life in America. It’s a show that is truer to life than any other sitcom I’ve watched.

I’m going to try and use my twitter a little more, I’m also gonna link said twitter to other profiles I have online so watch the fuck out for that.

That is all for now. Talk to you later!

Jeff Rodgers (9-7-2016)